Because you can’t make this drek up.

From years of being an athlete, I have dozens of pairs of short, white athletic socks. These socks are wildly comfortable. I would fashion an entire bodysuit out of them, if such thing were socially acceptable.

My fiancée has told me that these socks cannot be worn with business attire. This makes me sad. I’m supposed to wear thin-ass, scratchy black socks? That I have to pull up over my calves? Why don’t I just quit my job right now? Doesn’t seem worth it.

And then I find out, my belt has to match said socks. Now I need a black belt? I’m no Tae Kwon Do master, and I don’t purport to be one. I have to get all dressed up to go to Burlington Coat Factory to find the appropriately colored belt.

I threw away all my blue socks because I didn’t want to buy a blue belt.

I have a drawer full of awesome white socks that I can only wear one day a week. I sit and stare at those socks, wishing I could wear them; yearning, craving, desiring. The scratchy black socks mock me. They know I have to wear them, and they taunt me, slipping down to my ankles at the worst possible times.

I just got the news that my shoes have to match my belt. Wasn’t it the socks before? Surely, the socks and the shoes don’t have to match? Who made this so complicated? Why can’t I just wear white socks with Pumas at all times?

Screw this. I’m going barefoot.

1. Knock Knock Take out Menu Organizer, $22 2. Jonathan Adler Needlepoint Flask, $98 3. Keg Works Cocktail Bar Napkins, $19 4.Jonathan Adler Universal Smart Phone Dock, $48 5. Stainless-Steel Sharpie $8 6. One Hundred 80 DegreesWelcome to the Club Sandwich Coasters, $10

A sign from our patron saint, and a response to my telling her I’m mooning my neighbors in honor of her recent Anderson Cooper appearance/her show tonight.

Hello, ladies (and the one guy who reads this site to delve into the female mind and realize that we are just as confused about ourselves as you are),

I’ve been unusually quiet, haven’t I? Did you miss me? I’ve missed me, or rather, I’ve missed you. But it’s only fair, to the readers who have stayed with me through this journey I like to call What the Fuck Are Your 20s. While it initially began as a foray into learning how to date, coming out of the college “hook up phase,” I feel like the site has evolved, as I’m sure have you. I have been dating The NJB for a year now. I met him at an entrepreneurship panel, and I never wrote about our first date, but I will say that it changed my life. 

I feel like I’ve gotten away from that kernel. The essence of navigating the world of dating – online, in person, whether you want to date your friend or you have no idea what you want. And it’s not to say that it has to stop once you start dating someone – then there are a whole new set of avenues that you have to discover and are equally as trying and complex.

But the essence of it remains the same – that we all have no clue what we’re doing. I’m just being honest about it.

And I don’t mean in dating – I have lots to say on that subject, but in our careers, with our families (if you’re working out issues, or figuring out how to be an adult apart from them). 

That’s what this site is and has always been about – finding myself finding myself and your working on it with me. I really wish there were GPS for it. I think we all do. Sure, your twenties are a fun time to celebrate and figure out if you really ought to upgrade to nice bedding from the stuff you had in college that has the slightest stain from pepperoni. But it’s also a time to figure out who you are, who you want to be, in career, friendships, and dating.

I felt like if I wasn’t posting five times a week, or extremely funny, that somehow it wasn’t true to FFJD. But I’m human, and not a robot. Or Amber Rose posing as a robot in a Svedka ad that makes me uncomfortable but also wonder how her ladyparts can breathe in that full-on Spandex suit.

Here’s the thing – I can’t write FFJD by myself anymore. 

I can’t wax poetic about Constance (because she is way, way too busy clipping my toe-nails), and also because – we have to figure this all out together. I will be writing about dating topics when I can (not necessarily every day), and other dating-related content. I was lured by the pop culture allusions, the flash-in-the-pan entertainment. I also would like to touch on issues in friendships, and career, because those are equally as important pieces. And just as hard to navigate, no. As our Patron Saint Bethenny said, “you can have it all, but not all at once”. I think that was before she flashed her ass on Anderson Cooper and it had something to do with dieting. But I also think it’s true.

Yes, I am utterly hilarious and dream up sequences where I am a best-selling author, popping champagne (well, vodka-sodas) on a yacht in France with like three Malteses (I actually am not the biggest fan of small dogs). That much we know, but that’s not me all the time. If it were, I’d be Beyonce. If Beyonce were a Jewish girl in Washington locking herself out of her apartment and hugging a locksmith (last week).

Whether you’re dating someone seriously, or just beginning or date, or have no idea if your Saturday hookup is a regular thing, come here.

You can ask advice questions on Formspring.  I’ll be essaying, when I feel like I have something to say. I’m thinking of some new topics, but also, listening.

In the meantime, I might need you guys to do some talking for me.

You can submit stories to Constance@theffjd.com, or post ideas, or thoughts. She is available Tuesdays between 10:27 and 10:30 for erranding. Consider her a TaskRabbit (download that).

Meredith

Hey there FFJDers,

It’s Meredith. I began this blog as a single girl, graduating from college and learning the world of dating. I am now more grown up – having dated a lot of people, seen a lot of things, and ripened (like a fine wine or fruit or something) into a 25 year old girl who needs a break from her blog. Constance and I are going to do some traveling, and hopefully we’ll be back in the near future.

I love you all dearly, and thank you for reading. This site, after almost two years, has provided endless fodder, opportunities, and fun. But even I, with the word vomit of a thousand suns, need a break for a bit. 

And I’m working on a book. In the meantime, you can follow me on Twitter. I will also be posting a column on Huffington Post.

Meredith